The answer is, for too long I had a "temporary" website up that looked pretty good, but it had no substance. I made sure that the CSS (the coding language that handles layout and aesthetics) was alright, but the HTML (the coding language that handles content) was being neglected. I felt like it was a perfect metaphor for what my life had become.
From August 2023 until December 2025 I was trapped in a very toxic and abusive living situation (where I was abused both emotionally and sexually by a mentally unstable roommate who made me feel responsible for his self-harming and suicidal tendencies), and I lost site of who I was. I remember looking in the mirror and not being able to recognize the traumatized girl looking back at me. It's crazy how quickly I lost interest in the things that once made me happy just because I was trying so hard to survive.
Then for a few months in 2025 I was in a romantic relationship in which I felt too afraid to grow back into the woman I used to be because my boyfriend was too quick to jump to conclusions, and he showed me early on in the relationship that he saw me as disposable, and as a result I always felt anxious about saying or doing the "wrong" things. But even worse, he tried to stop me from making what turned out to be the best decision I've ever made, which was to leave Utah for a bit and go to Florida. Interestingly enough, I didn't realize just how emotionally unsafe and limiting that relationship felt until the few days leading to the break up.
In December of 2025 I quietly packed up my stuff, put it into storage while all of my roommates were at work, and flew to a city where I could not be followed because it wasn't on anyone's radar as a city I would travel to: Tampa, Florida. For the first time in well over two years I felt safe again and felt myself able to grow into the woman I was meant to be, and that is what I've continued to work on since then.
I hope to go back to an aesthetically pleasing website in the future, but for now my main priority is focusing on restoring my substance and rediscovering myself after trauma. In other words, restoring my HTML files, both literally and figuratively.
I am so grateful for my time in Florida. I'm grateful for the experiences I had there, and I feel so blessed that the people in Tampa and St Petersburg appreciated my art and let me entertain them. They didn't know my story, but they really helped to turn my life around both emotionally and financially.
I am an aunt to 21 adorable nieces and nephews (but you won't be seeing them on my social media because I am against posting kids online). When I travel I love to send each of them postcards.
I enjoy the violin. I guess this would be considered a "no duh" for most, but my practice sessions almost always put me in a good mood.
I love history, or at least learning about it. My favorite time periods to learn about are Ancient Rome, the European Renaissance, and World War II.
I love aviation and hope to fly someday.
I enjoy reading.
I enjoy singing.
I enjoy musical theatre.
I like decluttering and organizing.
My favorite movie is Jurassic Park
My favorite documentary is Waking Sleeping Beauty. Also, cel animation is my favorite form of animation.
My favorite book is Roverandom by J.R.R. Tolkien.
I like having a peaceful home. That's probably one of the reasons why I prefer to live alone.
I like adventure.
I like to make things with my hands.
I have a strong dislike for generative AI.
I like the classical aesthetic.
I believe in bringing back classical education.
I believe aging is a beautiful part of life.
I believe good mental health is important.
I believe practicing good manners is important and great for one's mental health. I started reading etiquette books in college, and it never ceases to amaze me that most people I've met have never thought it important to read them.
I love looking up at the night sky.
I enjoy listening to Gregorian Chants.
I enjoy learning Latin. In fact, I've enjoyed learning "dead" languages since I took a graduate level Old English class as an undergrad in college.
I believe it is important to learn new things and to avoid being discouraged by age.
I believe it's important to be healthy. I became very interested in nutrition when I was looking for ways to clear up my acne.
I believe it's important to break down myths about women's health.
I like to cook and bake.
I like being frugal.
I traveled quite a bit. I saw 10 countries before I turned seven years old, and as soon as I had the chance to (after graduating from college) I went on my first solo trip across three different continents. I've also managed to street perform in 17 different US cities.
I enjoy talking about politics if nuance is allowed.
I believe in the necessity of vaccines. In fact, I've been exposed to the measles more than any other American I've ever met and never got the measles myself because of my vaccine. However, the only difference between a vaccine mandate and sexual abuse is the weapon being used, because they are both a violation of a person's bodily autonomy and they are both caused by the same thing, which is a desire for power and control over another person. Since I believe it's important to have consistent ethics, I believe that people should have the freedom to make their own informed medical decisions.
I enjoy dancing, and learning belly dance made a huge positive difference in my life in 2017.
I like nature and I am a bit of an environmentalist.
I like doing analog things.
If I'm attracted to a guy, I immediately start to lose interest in him once he pulls out his phone and starts scrolling.
I like writing. In fact, if I could make a living by writing books and articles full time I wouldn't complain.
I like to code websites.
I like to check out other people's websites. If someone has a website, it's hard for me to not like him or her.
I want people to be able to connect with others and feel appreciated.
I believe it is possible to recover and heal from trauma.
I'm a romantic, even if I try to hide it.
I like sending snail mail. I also like to receive it, but that rarely happens.
I don't believe that therapy should always be a first resort when dealing with issues in life. I am willing to recognize the ways it has helped many people, but I am also quick to point out that it has a risk of iatrogenesis, just like in the medical field.
I like using all five senses. It's quite normal for me to smell trees, feel falling rain, listen to birds singing, look at a beautiful sunset, and enjoy an ice cream like it's my last one.
I like reading Psalms.
I like watching movies and listening to film soundtracks.
I don't play video games, but I enjoy listening to their soundtracks, and I have favorites based on their music alone.
I became a francophile in my early twenties, and I would say I'm still one.
I like building things. In fact, I started coding my engineering website a few years ago to share my various projects, but sadly I never published it.
I have always cared about helping people who have served in the military, so if I ever hear about organizations that help veterans I always want to support them.
I started volunteering in my community as soon as I was old enough to volunteer at the library (twelve years old). I started volunteering in my community again recently and it definitely helped me in healing from trauma.